Thursday, October 30, 2008

It's all about the candy

I love Halloween. It's the only time of the year when I can dress up in a costume in public. This will be my first Halloween at my new job. I work in an office and it looks like the holiday is celebrated with much fanfare. There will be a Halloween party during office hours which includes a pumpkin carving contest, a costume contest, food and fun. The party room is decorated with bats, spiders, cobwebs, jack-o-lanterns, witches, skulls, skeletons, ghosts, etc.

I will wear my conservative office witch costume: pumpkin-colored mock turtleneck, black pants, black cape and orange & black striped witch hat. In past Halloweens I've been Harpo Marx, a gypsy, a pirate...and a clown. I don't know about you, but clowns are really creepy. My vote for the scariest clown in the history of the world is Ronald McDonald. (Shiver!)

As for the home front, I give out candy to the kids. My preference is anything with chocolate. This year it's Kit Kats and Snickers. Today I went on a baking binge and made some chocolate cookies. Martha Stewart's recipe and very tasty. Tonight at our singing group, one of the ladies brought special treats: Halloween cupcakes with various "objects" stuck in the icing...eyeballs, spiders, bats, a green hand reaching out from the grave. I chose one of the eyeball cupcakes...it was chocolate. Enough said.

Monday, October 27, 2008

Iron Man

I'm one of those fortunate people to have a good friend who likes the same kinds of films I do. She recommends films for me to watch and vise versa. I've never once been disappointed.



I admit that I'm a fan of superhero movies, but I'm selective. Superman, Batman and Spider-Man...YES! Hulk, Hellboy, Hancock...not too crazy about.



At her suggestion, I just finished watching "Iron Man." I didn't know anything about it; I've never read the Iron Man story so my imagination was wide open for whatever Hollywood could throw my way.



My first spine-tingling thrill was realizing that Robert Downey Jr. starred in the movie. I did a double take. WHAT!? I've been a fan of RDJ for years. Loved him best in "Only You" with Marissa Tomei (who wouldn't?) Now he's a SUPERHERO? You've got to be kidding.



His character, Tony Stark, is a wealthy ego-maniac who just happens to be a brilliant scientist. Yes, they're a dime dozen.



I was also pleased that Jeff Bridges was in the movie. Another fave of mine. Loved him best in "The Fabulous Baker Boys" and his hilarious supporting role in "The Muse" with Albert Brooks who just happens to be the funniest man on earth.



I was surprised that Jeff was the bad guy. I hate it when he's the bad guy. Sigh. And why on earth was he BALD?! The bald wig was a big mistake. Looks great on Mike Meyers, but Jeff looked like Daddy Warbucks with a goatee.



Best scenes:



RDJ in the cave in Afghanistan creating the Iron Man prototype.



RDJ in his laboratory testing the new Iron Man prototype.



RDJ dancing with Gwenyth Paltrow.



GROSSEST SCENE: RDJ pulling that wire out of his nose. To tell the truth, I didn't even see it all the way through...had to close my eyes and peek through my fingers.



First Runner Up for GROSSEST SCENE: Gwenyth pulling the chest power plug out of RDJ's chest and replacing it with the new and improved one.



Most Satisfying Moment: RDJ is just about to die because Jeff stole his chest power plug. RDJ crawls to his lab to get the spare and can't reach it. He collapses and his robotic arm machine, sensing his need, gives it to him. The robot thingy should be nominated for best supporting actor.


Naturally, the theme song at the end was none other than Black Sabbath's "Iron Man."

In conclusion, I rank this one of the best superhero movies of all time.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Sure fire signs that your cow has mad-cow disease:

Your cow insists on wearing a little A-1 sauce behind each ear as cologne.

She refuses to let you milk her, saying "Not on the first date."

Your cow takes up painting and cuts off one of its ears.

Your cow gets a silicon implant for her udder.

Your cow appears on Oprah, claiming to be a horse trapped in a cow's body.

Your cow demands to be branded with the 'Golden Archs Logo'.

Your cow insists that all Hindus are sacred.

Your cow insists evaporated milk comes from thirsty cows.

Your cow quits the family dairy business and applies for a job at Burger King.

She starts giving you Milk of Amnesia.

Your cow joins the Hell's Angels because, hey, it already has a cool leather jacket.

Your cow starts smoking its grass rather than eating it.

Your cow spends half the day sitting in the Lotus Position chanting "MOO" backwards.

Your cow insists that it can give you chocolate milk if you started feeding it Hershey bars.

Your cow asks you to brand it again but only if you'll wear something sexy this time.

Your cow purposely blinds itself with a dart and yells "Bullseye"!

Your cow becomes a Muslim and asks to be called "LaCream Abdul Milkbar."

Your cow insists Milk Duds are the result of stupid cows.

Your cow starts laughing hysterically until milk spurts out its nose.

You find your cow hiding secret plans to burn down half of Chicago.

Your cow keeps wanting to chew other cows cuds.

Your cow believes it could really jump over the moon like in the nursery rhyme if it had a really good run at it.

Monday, October 06, 2008

Political Humor

Okay, I'm reading the op-ed section of the newspaper this morning and came across an article by Doug Hecox, a Wyomingite who just happens to live in Washington, D.C. and is also a comedian.


The article riffed on the VP debate that was held last Thursday between Sarah Palin and Joe Biden. Like me, Hecox is an undecided voter. The debate didn't sway his vote, nor mine. Although I'm leaning more toward Obama.

Anyway, back to the article. Here's an excerpt:

Literally, anything can happen with a McCain/Palin administration. For example, on January 20, Mr. McCain could become president. The next day, he would bomb Hanoi for obvious reasons and, hours later, he would likely be impeached--leaving Mrs. Palin as America's new president.

Here's a link to Hecox's website:

www.dougfun.com