Monday, August 14, 2006

Harpo Frizz


A brand new ice cream just arrived on the market. The Harpo Frizz. It's made of the finest quality ingredients. Lemony sherbet with cocoanuts and animal crackers.

Advertising Jingle:

My ice cream has a first name
It's H-A-R-P-O
My ice cream has a second name
It's F-R-I-Z-Z
Oh, I love to eat it every day
And if you ask me why I'll say
Cuz Harpo Frizz will curl your hair
And make you honk 'til people stare

Testimonials:

Scarlett O'Hara:
After a busy day washing Ashley's polo shirts and ironing his jockey shorts, I always look forward to a cool, refreshing Harpo Frizz. The sweet taste brings to mind my halcyon days at Tara before the Yankees burned Atlanta to the ground and forced me to make a dress out of Mama's portieres. As God is my witness, I will never be without a Harpo Frizz again!

Don Corleone:
I'm an honest man. Would I lie to you? No. I tell the truth. And the truth is that Harpo Frizz is the best ice cream in New York. Did I say, "New York"? No. The best ice cream in America. Did I say "America"? No. The best ice cream in the world. If you don't get Harpo Frizz, I can't guarantee your safety. Accidents happen. I have no control over what other people do. It's an offer you can't refuse.

Rick Blaine:
If you don't get Harpo Frizz, you're gonna regret it. Maybe not today. Maybe not tomorrow. But soon. And for the rest of your life.

Dirty Harry:
I know what you're thinking. Did he have six Harpo Frizzes or only five? Well, to tell you the truth, in all the excitement I kind of lost track myself. But you've got to ask yourself a question: Do you want another Harpo Frizz? Well, do ya, punk?

3 comments:

Horace J. Digby said...

Luana,

I love Harpo Frizz . . .
But does it really "make you honk 'til people stare?"
And those amazing testimonials . . . I didn't know Rick Blaine did endorsements.

Horace J. Digby

Horace J. Digby said...

Luana,

I love Harpo Frizz, but does it really "make you honk 'til people stare?"

And those amazing testimonials . . . I didn't know Rick Blaine did endorsements.

Your fan,
Horace J. Digby
http://www.lexingtonfilm.com

Luana said...

Thanks for reading, Horace! And yes, it does make you honk. Oh, yes...Rick Blaine has been a fan of Harpo Frizz for years. In fact, he wanted to add it to the menu at his cafe, but the government wouldn't allow it. Harpo was deemed a radical agitator and banned throughout Morocco. Sigh.