Wednesday, September 26, 2007


Newlyweds in elevator, embracing and snuggling throughout conversation.

YOUNG WOMAN: Darling, when we get to our new apartment, are you going to carry me over the threshold?

YOUNG MAN: Of course I am, sweetheart. It’s tradition.

Elevator stops. MIDDLE AGED WOMAN and MIDDLE AGED MAN step into the elevator; 40s/50s, nicely dressed. Husband carries a bottle of wine. Young couple moves to the side. MIDDLE AGED MAN pushes button.

MIDDLE AGED WOMAN: Why do we have to bring wine to a dinner party?

MIDDLE AGED MAN: You have to bring wine. It’s tradition.

Elevator stops. OLD MAN and OLD WOMAN step into elevator; 60s/70s. They stand at opposite sides with the other two couples in between. OLD WOMAN pushes button.

OLD WOMAN: I can’t believe they didn’t have oatmeal on the menu.

OLD MAN: Who eats oatmeal at a Chinese restaurant?

Elevator stops.

YOUNG MAN: Well, here we are, love muffin. Home sweet home. (Young couple exits).

OLD WOMAN: And I didn’t like what my fortune cookie said. “Live long and prosper.” What in the world does that mean? Is that a crack about my age?

OLD MAN: It’s from “Star Trek.” Sign of the Vulcan.

Elevator stops.

MIDDLE AGED WOMAN: Eighteen dollars for a bottle of wine! Unbelievable! (Middle aged couple exits. OLD MAN and OLD WOMAN are alone. Long period of silence.)

OLD WOMAN: What’s the point of the fortune cookie anyway? Tradition?

OLD MAN: No, I don’t think so. It just means the meal is over.


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